I Do Not Do No Rock And Roll No More

I've had a very uneasy relationship with rock music since I was about 12 and discovered the blues. After that discovery, rock just seemed like a poor, watered down, whitened version of the real thing. There were rock bands who played the blues well like the Allman Brothers. There were rock bands who played the blues poorly, but watered it down in a way that white suburban kids could handle it like Eric Clapton in whatever band he was in or The Rolling Stones. Then there were rock bands that really weren't rock bands at all but rather were English music hall bands who played with rock instruments like The Beatles. I liked The Beatles quite a bit, but it was like cheating to say that because of them I liked rock and roll.

There have been rock groups or acts I've admired along the way. The aforementioned Beatles, The Band (really a bluegrass group that played rock instruments), Adrian Belew (really an experimental musician who played rock instruments), Dave Alvin (when he stopped being a rocker), Elvis Costello (a literate rocker), Joe Henry (really a literate r&b guy), The Talking Heads (really a world music band), and John Hiatt come to mind. But as you can see from all of the qualifiers after their names, I don't consider most of them to be rockers at heart.

Then there are contemporary pop musicians who I don't think anyone would call rockers that I've loved like Randy Newman and Paul Simon. But mostly, I'm much happier listening or writing stuff in styles that came before Elvis.

Rock and me just haven't been a good fit. The whole idea behind what makes a rock band - a group of people with limited understanding and history of music who are typically angry and lousy aliterate bad boy students trying to make art or entertainment - is something I just don't understand. I was a good student. I studied music. For me, the idea is to play music well and be literate. The instruments need to be in tune. The singing better be solid. The players need to know how to play. The writer needs to know more than a bit about what preceded him (no, Mr. Rocker, music did not begin with The Beatles). And if you're angry, maybe you should see a therapist or get some drugs instead of imposing your bad mood on an audience.

That's not to say I don't like outside art as music. If someone like a Daniel Johnston wants to hand out handmade tapes where he pours out his heart, that's a wonderful thing. I was just listening to some music by Mingering Mike - the guy who made all of those wonderful album covers for his fictitious "soul superstar" career - and that was interesting (if barely listenable) in its own way, as well.

But for me, rock as practiced on music labels and on radio stations is a corrupted outside art. It seems to be far less about the music - which is usually awful - than the culture. It's the money. It's the drugs. It's the sex. It's about being fashionable and cool with a fake kind of angst and strut. It's a pose. There are enough poseurs in the world without rock and roll. Plus the rise of rock pushed out wonderful music written by jazz cats and non-rock songwriters from the public marketplace.

A few weeks ago, I was watching two pretty decent rock bands, Death Cab for Cutie and My Morning Jacket play on TV. For me, those two are the good part of rock and roll. Both bands came up slowly by word of mouth and established a name for themselves free of record label hype. They're both fronted by a troubadour kind of figure. Personally, I find Death Cab for Cutie far too pretentious and twee (plus the musicianship is kind of lousy), but that's just me. My Morning Jacket is far more easy for me to listen to.

But in both cases, when I listen I'm not listening as a fan. I'm just judging the music from a distance. As I'm listening, I'm asking myself, "If I was 20 years old or so again, would I like this?" Lyrically, the songs are not meant for guys or gals my age. They don't translate well to people who have decades of life experience.

On the other hand, that same night I watched an old rock act play, Van Morrison. OK, he isn't exactly rock, but he's close. Van Morrison was never a good live performer, and now he just looks too old and tired to go out there night after night. It was a painful listen.

Groups like My Morning Jacket prove that rock and roll is alive and well. But it's not for me. It barely was for me when I was young. It's certainly not for me now.

I've been in rock bands. A few months ago, some young guy heard me playing solo and asked me after if I wanted to front a punk band. I just laughed. I said to him, "You need to find some tall skinny young guy who exudes so much sexuality that women will throw their thongs onstage during a show, not me." My rock and roll playing days are definitely over.

Same with rock songs. I still get ideas for them in my head. But like Winston Churchill once said about exercise, I lie down and wait until the urge passes. I do not do no rock and roll no more.